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If You Support Marriage with Dowry, Then You Should Also Support Divorce Without Alimony
Hello folks, my name is Gurkaran, and I work as a Specialist Cloud Engineer at LTIMindtree. Today, I want to share a story that deeply affected me. It’s about my close friend Harman, who faced a life-altering ordeal after his marriage. His experience raises important questions about fairness, dowry, and alimony in our society.
The Beginning of a Dream Marriage
Harman, a self-made man from a middle-class family, got married in January 2024. It was a joyous occasion, not just for him but for his entire family. After years of struggle and hard work, he had saved around ₹6–7 lakh and even took a loan of ₹10 lakh to ensure his marriage was everything he and his family had dreamed of.
From renovating his house to buying gold jewelry and bridal clothes for his bride, Rajvinder, he spared no expense. His wedding day on January 24, 2024, was a grand celebration, followed by a honeymoon that brought happiness to both families.
Trouble Begins After Marriage
However, within just three months, cracks began to appear in the relationship. Harman noticed tension brewing at home, primarily stemming from his wife, Rajvinder. She started playing divide-and-rule tactics between him and his family. Harman’s once peaceful home turned into a battlefield of mistrust and conflicts.
One day, after a heated argument, Rajvinder created a massive scene, damaging household items and threatening suicide. The next day, she called her father, who arrived at Harman’s house, hurled insults at the family, and took Rajvinder back home.
Demands and Threats
What followed was even more disheartening. Rajvinder’s family began making unreasonable demands, including ownership of one of Harman’s family properties and complete control over their household decisions. When these demands weren’t met, they decided to file for divorce.
As part of the settlement, Rajvinder’s family demanded ₹8 lakh in alimony, claiming reimbursement for their “marriage expenses,” even though they had declared during the wedding that they were financially incapable of contributing to a big celebration.
The Legal Ordeal
Harman’s nightmare didn’t end there. Rajvinder’s family filed a complaint in the women’s cell (Mahila Mandal). Each visit to the cell was humiliating for Harman and his family, as they were scolded and treated as culprits without any investigation. Eventually, a police constable approached them and bluntly suggested that unless they paid a bribe of ₹3 lakh, the harassment would continue.
In the end, the settlement cost Harman not just the ₹8 lakh demanded by Rajvinder’s family but also ₹50,000 demanded by a self-proclaimed “uncle” of Rajvinder, along with the bribe to the authorities. In total, Harman spent over ₹18 lakh on a marriage that lasted barely a few months and was forced to part with even more money in a settlement.
A Question of Fairness
Harman’s story highlights the deep flaws in the system. Here are some pressing questions that arise:
- If a groom doesn’t take dowry, why is he still liable to pay alimony when the marriage fails?
- Shouldn’t the law take into account the financial contributions and sacrifices made by both parties?
- Why is the legal process so biased that the groom’s side is presumed guilty without proper investigation?
The Broader Issue
This is not just Harman’s story. Many men in India face similar situations where they are burdened with unreasonable demands and legal biases. While the intention behind laws protecting women is noble, misuse of these laws has become increasingly common, leaving innocent families vulnerable.
If dowry is a punishable offense, shouldn’t the same principle apply to unfair alimony demands? Marriage should be a union of equals, and if it fails, the consequences should be fair and just for both parties.
Conclusion
Harman’s ordeal raises critical issues about the fairness of marriage laws in India. It’s time to question societal norms and demand reforms that ensure justice for everyone, regardless of gender.
As we move forward, let’s remember this: If we condemn dowry in marriages, we must also advocate for fair divorce settlements that reflect equality and justice.
